Monday, February 23, 2009

AA at 81

Unabashedly addicted, I virtually quiver in boyish anticipation as the yearly Academy Award Show approaches, reveling in the good, the bad, and the truly ugly moments, checking off my Oscar choices, and rooting for the deserved and railing against the undeserved. And, of course, handing out my own awards the day after.

Michael J. Pollard Surprise Award: Oscar Show Producers Bill Condon and Laurence Mark, creating the most watchable Academy Award show in years

Billy Crystal on Steriods Award: Hugh Jackman for tossing away a traditional opening monologue and going for the Crystal-like jokey song –and-dance number

Rob Lowe/Snow White Award: “The Musical is Back” production mismash (credited to Baz Lurhman), despite the presence of the dynamic Beyonce

Mickey Rourke Daddy-O Hair Award: Multiple winners, including Man on a Wire director James Marsh (gigolo Dracula look), Slumdog cinematographer Anthony Dod Mantle (aging Brit rockstar look), and presenter Adrien Brody (Charlie Manson disciple look)

I Know That You Know That I Know Award: Watching Jerry Lewis carefully contain himself as he delivered a surprisingly short, shockingly unsentimental, impeccably worded acceptance speech, looking all the while like Quasimodo-meets-the-monkey-man, or Jekyll about to transform into Hyde as split-second expressions of rubbery mayhem threatened to tear away his deep-boned attempt at steely sincerity

Lovelier Than a Hundred Dollar Bill Wrapped Around A Piece of White Chocolate Award: Penelope Cruz

Ain’t Gonna Really Help the Revolution Catchphrase Award: Sean Penn’s “You commie, homo-loving sons of guns”

Bad Chemistry Award # 1: Sarah Jessica Parker and Daniel Craig

It’s Called Timing Award: Steve Martin and Tina Fey very funny screenplay presentation

It’s Called Concept AND Execution Award: Ben Stiller’s hilarious Joaquin Phoenix riff

Blink and You Missed It Award: Judd Apatow’s amusing take on the critically flayed comedic box office hits montage

Forever Young Award: Eva Marie Saint, Shirley MacLaine, and Sophia Loren

Scarier Than Hellboy Award: Goldie Hawn

I Wanna Hang With Him Award: Josh Brolin

Please Put Yer Hair Back Down Award
: Diane Lane

Bad Chemistry Award # 2: Zac Efron and Alicia Keyes

Yes Indeed I’m in Love Again Award: Marisa Tomei

Orson Welles Woulda Been Proud Award: The simple, but highly effective incorporating of classic film moments into each Best Film montage

Ahh, Growing Up Award: Natalie Portman

Simplicity, That is Thy Name: All in all smart and brief acceptance speeches, and not one orchestra play-off

Do It Again Award: Sheer genius, tasteful and emotional affecting, and, as the night wore on, almost suspenseful (who would appear, and which presenter would be teamed-up with which nominee)-the whole idea of having former winners gathered to present the four acting wards

Close, But No Cigar Award: Me, myself and I, for hitting 19 outta 24 winners correctly.


mdoggie said...

I'm gonna guess the one's you missed:

Your heart held out for Mickey even though your head knew it was Sean.

I think you missed both supporting categories, possibly going for Brolin and Amy Adams.

Cinematography could have gone to The Dark Knight or Benjamin Buttons

Art Direction usually likes a film like The Duchess or maybe Dark Knight

Someone will have to explain to me again why there is a distinction made between "Sound" and "Sound Editing" - well not really but maybe you missed one of those

Scotty D said...

Actually, my head beat out my heart and I had Sean down. Missed Foreign Film, thought it would have to be the much praised The Class or Waltz with Bashir, missed Cinematography, figuring Button would eke that out, missed Costumes by betting on Baz and his bomb of a period piece Australia, and missed the often impossible-to-guess Documentary Short, and Animated Short (hadda pick Prseto since I actually saw it)

mdoggie said...

I am still laughing at "Presto" months later. The intensity of my laughter when watching this in the theater frightened those around me.