Friday, August 22, 2008

Bottom Feeder Time

Weasel. Worm. Rodent. Nightcrawler. Chipmunk. Independent Man. They are all the same. John DePetro, that bastion of radio wisdom, the man with the most acute case of the Napoleonic complex in all of Rhode Island, the guy who has his daily swim around the bottom of the barrel airwaves publicly everyday while he lies heavily at the lowermost of local radio popularity pulls a sixth grade cheating move with the Arbitron ratings and unbelievably lets his wife take the bullet. Funny as it is (didn’t the little fella look screamingly hilarious offering up his pale-faced mea culpa on the local TV news spots?) it’s simultaneously sad and sickening. Since WPRO, in their infinite wisdom (any buzz is good buzz right?), is allowing Mr. Standup to use his tiny feet and tap dance over his wife’s prone body, they ought give him a new grabber of a nickname. How bout Little Johnny Emasculation? Or John “No Balls” DePetro? Those who mistakenly listened to his show of shows have always known he was a low rent circus clown, but we never realized what a truly pathetic creature he’d become.

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